GREEN HUMMERS?

"Green is the new Red, White and Blue." There’s nothing cheesier and nothing that can help a group avoid the facts quite like a good slogan. For some reason, if you simply have a catchy, short slogan, any reasonable amount of work on one’s part to justify it becomes unreasonable.

"Save Our Planet" is a popular bumper sticker. I guess just wearing it on your bumper proves that you and the celebrities you worship possess all the wisdom necessary to automatically make it profound. It’s especially profound when you see it on a ratted out 70s vintage clunker that’s spewing farts of black smoke and leaves such a sulfur, burning oil, rotting exhaust stench that you have to pass it on the highway to keep from gagging or passing out from the unholy emissions….or if you see it on a SUV sporting soccer decals or - my favorite - a Hummer!

Some of you are at least as old as I, so you may remember global cooling. In 1975 the New York Times couldn’t find enough ink to scare the hell out of any among the unwashed (and fairly enough, gullible) masses needy enough for sensation to read it, with warnings about how we would soon be under advancing glaciers. Then it was in the 80s that we got to hear a constant drone about the hole in the Ozone layer. This was trapping greenhouse gasses, so the “experts” told us, which were going to wreak imminent hell and unfathomable disaster if we didn’t raise taxes. We supposedly blew the hole in the Ozone with Aerosol cans and such. Now scientists are saying that the hole in the Ozone layer was caused by excessive cooling from the Arctic and Antarctic. (I’m so confused!!) It’s nothing short of amazing how a few short years of research and better science can solve such potentially catastrophic challenges.

As the 90s progressed we saw more and more “proof” of the impending doom we call global warming. Here is a phenomenon that demands raising taxes, weakening the U.S. economy and sacrificing our national sovereignty. That’s OUR national sovereignty. Or, as another solution one idiot recently suggested to me, we should turn off the water while brushing our teeth! That one falls firmly into the ‘I SHIT YOU NOT!!!’ CATEGORY! I guess the non-polluters like China, Russia, India, etc. (you know, the little countries with no industry) need not participate much in the solution.

Global warming made headlines when 1,600 scientists signed a letter warning of the “devastating consequences” of global warming. But the mainstream media left out the part of the story about the 17,000 scientists who signed a petition saying there’s no convincing evidence that greenhouse gases will disrupt the earth’s climate. Another little tidbit of information…if you look at a temperature anomaly chart covering the past 10,000 years, you’ll see that for most of those years the temperature was warmer than it is today. But hell, that isn’t the kind of stuff that sells newspapers or gets seven or eight people tuning into Katie Couric every night!

My favorite author, Robert J. Ringer, long ago observed that “As a general rule, the less a slogan says, the greater the popularity of its basic ‘philosophy’ and the more people to whom it has the potential of appealing.” This part I particularly want to note: “Slogans are used because, to the unthinking individual, they appear on the surface to be interchangeable with fact…the more clever the slogan, the less the crusader need concern himself with facts.”

So, take this as you wish, but if you’re simple enough… Please, “Save the Planet!”

So much to say, so little time before we 'destroy the planet.'

JD.

AND THE LOSER IS...THE GOOD OLE U.S .of A.!

As I wrote this…
Chris Matthews was commenting on MSNBC about the Democratic candidates’ debate, MSNBC being the only network I could tell was airing it, with both his viewers tuned in, and on the edge of their seats.

Clinton and Biden sidestepped the question when they were asked if they agreed with Senator Harry Reid’s assessment that the war in Iraq was lost. Maybe they, too, are still trying to decide who won…Al Qaeda? The Sunnis? The Shiites? Iran? Michael Moore?

With no major gaffs, at least for as long as I could stay awake, the obvious hypocrite of the night was…besides the rest of them…John Edwards.

Here’s a guy who acted embarrassed when asked about a $400 haircut while on the campaign trail, the money of which came from campaign funds. When asked about it during the debate he retorted that he hadn’t forgotten where he came from. His humble roots story is thus: He recalled that once when he went out to dinner as a child, having to leave because his father could not afford the prices. Wowee! Hell of a story…such hardship!

But what about John Edwards now, and before he became a Senator? What was he up to before the well read citizenry of North Carolina elected him as Senator of their great State? He was an extremely successful trial lawyer who made between forty and eighty million dollars by suing doctors and hospitals. He earned a fortune suing on behalf of children born with cerebral palsy. Ironically, scientists now say cerebral palsy is seldom caused by anything a doctor does in the delivery room. But as one of several negative consequences of his crusade to ruin doctors’ reputations and livelihoods, 76 percent of America’s obstetricians have been sued.

Dickie Scruggs, one of America’s most successful trial lawyers, told John Stossel of ABC News that Edwards is a master litigator. “It’s an art form,” Scruggs told Stossel, “and John Edwards practiced it very successfully.” Another consequence of Edwards’ lawsuits is that the incidence of cesarean sections has risen to 28 percent of all births in 2003, from 6 percent in 1970. At the same time, Dr. Edgar Mandeville, a revered New York surgeon says that “There has not been one small decrease in the cerebral palsy rate across the board.”

Thank you John Edwards for causing a dramatic increase in medical malpractice insurance, therefore a dramatic increase in the cost of having a baby and plenty more pain and risky surgery for millions of American women. Not to mention a dramatic shortage in obstetricians these days. Why be in such a high risk field…with a 76 percent litigation rate? Can’t blame the doctors for jumping from disciplines that are exploited by sleazes like Edwards, or for leaving States that have high litigation rates.

Another consequence of this type of litigating behavior? According to a Department of Heath and Human Services study, doctors, nurses and hospitals are less likely to report problems. As a result, “As many as 95 percent of adverse events are believed to go unreported.” What a guy! The real article! Snake among snakes! Worthy of standing on that stage with seven other “interesting” Democratic hopefuls! And the Republican lineup so far? I’m nauseated just thinking about it…

Boy, it’s a scary political stage we’re on…and make no mistake, we’ve all got a part. And eventually, the fat lady will sing!

JD.

I'M CURIOUS, WHAT DO BUSH AND CORN HAVE IN COMMON?

I don’t know about you but I’m really, really tired of the media, politicians and various causes using skewed statistics to get our attention and to nudge us into changing our lifestyles. Now, I’m not afraid of bad news, but I want accurate, researched bad news and I want it from easily accessible sources, such as the network news programs and the more popular print media (nor do I want sensationalized bad news…bad is bad). I shouldn’t have to go practically underground to get facts and straight-up unbiased information. I’m not naïve enough to believe that bias can actually be eliminated in reporting. One unbiased approach would be to admit it’s human nature to add bias to just about anything that’s reported, through inflection and body language, not to mention the natural tendencies to write with a bias since word formation is going to come from a brain that is washed in whatever the person owning it has a tendency to wash it with. Everything is bound to be said with a slant of some sort. I just wish the “mainstream” whatever, would just admit it like so many of today’s talking heads do. Say what you ‘are’, or try to avoid being ‘it.’ But please, at least try to present facts as they exist, not how you’d like them to be. Please look into your sources’ sources.

Ethanol. There’s a seven letter word if I ever heard one. The moment I heard President Bush tout the merits of ethanol during his State of the Union Address, I knew the price of gas would go up. The press has jumped on this issue, and the supposed merits of ethanol, nauseously. A gasoline additive that is made primarily from corn, one of the most heavily subsidized crops in the United States, ethanol is poised to become one of our most original tax scams. Hmmm…who could possibly benefit from this seemingly expensive proposal? Was the President misinformed? If he was, there’s no excuse for it, he was supposed to be telling us the State of the Union, for God’s sake! Is he pandering? Let’s see, two words….Iowa Caucus! Gee, I can’t imagine a politician promoting the use of such a highly subsidized crop in a state like…IOWA! What political party wouldn’t benefit from that?! Corn is subsidized in so many ways that one of the more original methods is for the government to grant a 52 cent a gallon tax break to businesses that use…you guessed it…ethanol! It is currently more expensive to produce ethanol than it is to produce gasoline. Yet ethanol is supposed to save us by reducing our dependence on foreign oil. American farmers cannot produce enough corn to supply us with the amount of ethanol that is mandated now. Hard to believe a politician could sell our best interest for his own interests, or that of his Party. Come to think of it, a few days after Archer Daniels Midland Chairman, Dwayne Andreas, gave the Democrats a check for $100,000, President Clinton ordered 10 percent of the country to use ethanol. You don’t think Bush could have….no, can’t imagine. Welfare Queen, ADM, is one of the worlds largest corn pushers, uh, corn product producers.

I’ve got an idea for reducing our dependency on foreign oil, how about producing our own oil! If China can drill for oil off our coast, in Cuba, why can’t we? How about we sink some wells in ANWAR? Could it be the Caribou don’t want us there? I don’t believe anyone has asked them. I’m sure it’s not because of a possible backlash from the tourism industry. If you guess that maybe a thousand people visit that extremely remote region of our planet every year, that’s only one six millionth of the world’s population. That’s .0000006.

That’s enough for today. We can visit that one again and again, and we just might. Goodness knows there is plenty to say!

Senator Harry Reid, esteemed Democrat from Nevada, said the war is lost. I’ve got to know…if the war is lost, then who won it?! Please tell us the rest of the story, Harry!

JD

ALL'S NOT ROSIE - THANKFULLY!

Jeez! I never thought exploiting the stupidity of hypocrites would be so satisfying. Buy you know what? I bet that’s the same kind of thing the likes of Sheryl Crow and Rosie O’Donnell say about the Bush Administration…Actually, I’ve never heard them speak that kindly of the Administration.

As you undoubtedly know by now, Crow and Laurie David (wife of Seinfeld creator, Larry David) have been on a “Stop Global Warming College Tour”, riding in their “eco-friendly bus.” Let’s pretend for a moment that we don’t know that Laurie David refuses to fly commercial so she uses a private jet to crisscross the country between LA and New York. Oh, you didn’t know that? Hell, that’s just for starters…but I digress. When the white trash of pop announced her solution to global warming, even the white trash of talk couldn’t agree. Crow’s suggestion that we use one sheet of toilet paper per ‘event’ didn’t even pass the scrutiny of the lazy, jump-on-any-bandwagon, don’t-try-an-original-thought Hollywood crowd. In fact Rosie had to ask Sheryl, on “The View,” “Have you seen my ass?!” Well, how could we miss it, Rosie. And thanks for the visual. By the way, Barbara Walters was kind enough to warn viewers not to use their sleeves, another of Crow’s helpful suggestions. Yuck!

Back to the white trash of pop. This is someone who, according to TheSmokingGun.com, demands in her performance rider for each show to include three tractor trailers, four buses and six cars for her entourage. She also insists on 12 bottles of Grolsch beer, six bottles of “local” beer and a bottle each of “good Australian Cabernet” and “good Merlot.” Have another drink, Sheryl! – And then tell me more how to sacrifice!

Now back to the white trash of talk. At a luncheon yesterday celebrating women in New York media, the ever classless O’Donnell, who was MC at the event, railed against Donald Trump by grabbing her crotch and shouting, “Eat me!” Well, being vulgar is one thing and everyone has to have a talent, I suppose, but there were 17 high school girls in the room and her comment wasn’t lost on them or others accompanying them, who thought the comment inappropriate. That’s just a ‘sample’ of how the MC job was played out.

Let’s not stop there, though. Seems Rosie wasn’t the only Lesbian at a recent taping of “The View.” After taping of the episode, audience members were kept in the studio for a performance by “All My Children’s” resident - are you ready for this? - “male-to-female transgendered British lesbian rock star, Zarf/Zoe/Freddy.” Huh????!!! I guess the set doubled for a taping of………whatever…..

So I just watched Charles Gibson parrot the old story about women making something like 25 percent less than men in equal positions. Have any of you ever looked into this statistic? Well, obviously Charlie and his lazy staff have not. But we don’t expect ABC to let facts and sound reporting get in the way of a sensationalized story! I don’t know if any of you readers out there are employers, but wouldn’t you hire only women if you could get them for 25 percent less? I’m pretty sure the Company I work for would! But that’s a whole other half-told story that we can discuss some other time.

Back to the toilet paper issue. Maybe Sheryl meant this; if you download an episode of "The View" onto your IPod and wrap it in one sheet of toilet paper, you could cover four or five asses at one time…depending on whether Babwa was there. You think?

Let’s talk about abortion, crime and a dead Romanian President. Okay, tomorrow!
Or maybe oil. We’ll see…

JD.

ON BURKAS AND BULLIES!

Now that we know it apparently is not a crime to torture and murder people for being “morally corrupt”, according to the Iranian Supreme Court (see my April 22nd blog), it is time for President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad to crack down on some real criminals. I’m speaking, of course, about women who wear skimpy overcoats in Iran. Now that Spring is here, some wild and crazy, yet stylish, Iranian women have been anarchistic enough to wear overcoats that are too tight. According to the Associated Press, nearly 300 women have been arrested for wearing too tight an overcoat or letting too much hair peek out from under their veil, in a crackdown by Iranian police. So far, according to the AP, 278 women have been detained, 231 of whom were released after they signed papers promising they wouldn’t appear “inadequately dressed in public.” Another 3,538 women have been given “warnings and Islamic guidance.” Twelve men have been detained for wearing tight pants or short-sleeve shirts. Boy, a day beside the pool wouldn’t be too enjoyable over there I suppose!

I really hate to breach this subject, but I’ve been asked by an anonymous visitor to this site to opine on victimhood and serial killers. The commonality being, are people who are bullied a good share of their lives and then choose to whack innocent people, victims, too, as some in the press would portray them? That’s a scary question and undoubtedly one that few people are politically incorrect enough to tackle. So here goes…

My personal opinion? (Deep breath). A little disclaimer…When I was in middle school, I was bullied unmercifully…for four years. Now, some smartass is chuckling thinking it took me four years to attend middle school. Real funny! But it continued into my freshman year in high school, until I changed schools in tenth grade. When I arrived at the new high school, I picked out the first person who mumbled something under his breath, made an appointment for after school and then pummeled him senseless. I established myself in my new school as someone not to be messed with and I haven’t put up with any crap since.

So did the bullying drive me into a deranged stupor that has me donning wild west dusters and microwaving cats? No. Did it affect my sensibilities permanently? Yes! I still harbor anger and disbelief at the cruelty kids can level at one another. I fight an occasional temptation to confront my onetime tormentors, to face them as adults and let them know what imbeciles they were/are. What a colossal waste of time that would be. But I sure don’t hate anybody enough to go Russell Crowe on them, let alone shoot them. No, though I can certainly relate to some serious internal rage, I can’t think of anyone I hate enough to kill! Do I have sympathy and feel some empathy for Mr. Cho? I’ll be the first to admit, yes. Do I think he’s anything less than evil for what he’s done? A resounding NO! Do I think the press in all their infinite…and you do understand the fondness I have for the mainstream press…in their infinite wisdom, have a point when they try to describe Mr. Cho as a victim? Not at all in the sum of the events that took place on that sad, sad day.

I’ll say this, and mean it. None of us should tolerate bullies and bullying! We should know what our kids are up to, what their friends are up to and never stop teaching them a lifelong lesson against that useless and killing behavior. It at least kills the spirit, if not, eventually, human beings.

Now I am going to leave that subject alone for a while and let the 32 victims of that maniac rest, and leave the memories of them to their grieving families. Enough on that subject for now, and unless you were personally touched by the Virginia Tech massacre, I hope you don’t exploit it either.

JD.

AND I THOUGHT ALEC BALDWIN WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS!

If you were unfortunate (or fortunate, depending upon your politics) enough to have watched the annual White House Correspondents’ Dinner Saturday night, then like me you witnessed one of the most uncomfortable toasts ever to be hoisted and dropped on an individual or entity… Meaning, of course, President Bush and the current Administration.
Let’s pretend for a moment that the room was a bit subdued by the tragic events that took place at Virginia Tech a few days earlier. The murders that took place there struck at our hearts as a very sad and painful punch to our collective groin. Let’s pretend that the war in Iraq has gotten so ugly in the view of the mainstream press and most of the people who are remiss enough to drink all their worldly knowledge from that dark well, to instigate a national state of funk. And on top of all that, we have the imminent disaster of global warming staring us down with all its impending doom and gloom. I know, because Al Gore said so.
So let’s assume the Press Corps was pretty down and out about all this, though they managed to yuck it up with each other between their scowling at the event’s speakers. I guess it was too much of a mission for the press and the esteemed Hollywood crowd to show their contempt for the President, to let little things like manners and just being polite get in the way.
After all, they had policy issues to work out! I’m referring, as one example, to those renowned scientists and total hypocrits Laurie David and Sheryl Crow. Both incensed at not being able to convince Karl Rove that he should change his thinking on global warming. Why, “Rude!” they shouted at not being able to ambush and level Mr. Rove with all their tact and knowledge. Why should Rove not listen to their diatribe? Instead, they wrote, “Mr. Rove launched into a series of illogical arguments regarding China not doing enough thus neither should we (Since when do we follow China’s lead?", they wrote. Well, please forgive me on this one for not awarding immediate credence to these two world leaders and what I’m sure is their absolutely finely tuned and educated opinion of, and well researched analysis of, Chinese affairs and foreign relations.
We also have to give Sheryl her due, for this is how she summed up the global warming issue: “This is, now, this is about all of us, we all want clean air and water. The environment is like a spring day and a shady tree. It doesn’t belong to any one particular party or group…that’s an important message for Earth Day today.” I shit you not!!! Now we know what keen, insightful brilliance this minstrel genius has been hiding from us.
Back to the Dinner. It was shameful how the Press Corps treated the President and the speakers who took time out of their lives to “roast” him. Even Tony Snow, who looked understandably haggard considering he is recovering from very recent surgery due to the return of cancer, was received more poorly than Mr. Bush at a NAACP rally.
I have no doubt whatsoever that Iran’s President Ahmadinejad would have been received much more warmly. After all, he is yet another oppressed victim of the current American “Regime.” Speaking of, did you hear the one about the Iranian Supreme Court overturning the death sentence of one Ali Maleki, who, with several accomplices, drowned a man and his fiancé in a small pool for being morally corrupt under Islamic law? Their crime, you ask? They were holding hands in public.
Mr. Maleki and five other assailants stoned one person to death and tied up four others, in yet another incident, before throwing them into a swimming pool where they drowned. But why would the press get off their collective asses and report something like that? Laziness?? Certainly not bias!!!
But more about that some other time.

Did you "Save the Planet" today?

JD.